WASHINGTON—As income inequality continues to render middle currencies obsolete, the United States Department of the Treasury reportedly began phasing out all bills Monday except for $1s and $100s. “In an effort to streamline our operations so they’re more in line with the current financial landscape, we will be removing all intermediate monetary denominations,” said Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen, explaining how all fives, tens, twenties, and fifties will be taken out of circulation after years of growing disuse due to socioeconomic stratification. “Although these medial assets once had a utility, that is no longer the case. The vast majority of U.S. citizens can only scrounge a couple bucks together, while the wealthiest Americans have no use for banknotes under $100, and we want to ensure our legal tender reflects that.” At press time, Americans began collecting these antiquated bills as remnants of a bygone era.