What To Say If Your Boss Asks You To Work On Christmas

Maybe some Gift Of The Magi serendipity will soften your boss’ cold heart.

Remind your boss that you’re also a sergeant in the ongoing war on Christmas and that you’ll be busy fighting to make sure everyone has an agnostic day on Dec. 25.

Your boss won’t ask you to work if they know you’re Mr. Christ himself.

Keep them guessing; you don’t owe anyone an explanation.

This will guilt him into thinking you still talk to your family.

This Christmas, give your employer the gift of labor exploitation.

Keep this on the hush-hush, but your boss will happily accept a bribe of one U.S. dollar.

It’s important to put that bitch in his place.

Yes, LeBron. You always play on Christmas.

Even if you’re not Jewish, claiming Judaism as your faith is a foolproof way to stick it to management.

An email auto-reply should get your boss off your back for at least an hour or so.

The struggle of having two part-time jobs to make ends meet is when they both want to underpay you and make you work on holidays.

This might just be easiest if you’re a total kissass.

Everyone knows you won’t get a date then anyways.

The work is your gift, bum.

Don’t be afraid to tell them that you know your worth.

Children learn best from an absent parent.

Bosses should always be respected.