Tips For Going Through A Divorce

Start Slideshow

About half of all marriages end in divorce, in what can be an incredibly painful process for a couple to go through. The Onion offers some helpful tips for taking stress and anxiety out of a divorce.

Previous Slide

Next Slide

2 / 10

Take a moment to be grateful that you’re not nearly wealthy enough to have any meaningful assets to fight over.

Previous Slide

Next Slide

3 / 10

If you have young children, consider staying together until they’re old enough to wish you’d ended this loveless charade years ago.

Previous Slide

Next Slide

4 / 10

If you let her keep the house, she may consider taking you back.

Previous Slide

Next Slide

5 / 10

Rather than looking at the situation as the end of a fruitful relationship with your spouse, try looking at it as the beginning of a fruitful relationship with your divorce lawyer.

Previous Slide

Next Slide

6 / 10

Remind your children that this isn’t their fault, but they definitely aren’t making it easier.

Previous Slide

Next Slide

7 / 10

Don’t forget to take care of yourself emotionally and physically during the process so you can really stick it in your ex’s fat fucking face.

Previous Slide

Next Slide

8 / 10

Keep the lines of communication between you and your ex open in order to avoid your twin daughters reconnecting at sleepaway camp and hatching a plan to make you two fall in love all over again.

Previous Slide

Next Slide

9 / 10

Tips For Going Through A Divorce

Tips For Going Through A Divorce

Take a moment to be grateful that you’re not nearly wealthy enough to have any meaningful assets to fight over.

Take a moment to be grateful that you’re not nearly wealthy enough to have any meaningful assets to fight over.

If you have young children, consider staying together until they’re old enough to wish you’d ended this loveless charade years ago.

If you have young children, consider staying together until they’re old enough to wish you’d ended this loveless charade years ago.

If you let her keep the house, she may consider taking you back.

If you let her keep the house, she may consider taking you back.

Rather than looking at the situation as the end of a fruitful relationship with your spouse, try looking at it as the beginning of a fruitful relationship with your divorce lawyer.

Rather than looking at the situation as the end of a fruitful relationship with your spouse, try looking at it as the beginning of a fruitful relationship with your divorce lawyer.

Remind your children that this isn’t their fault, but they definitely aren’t making it easier.

Remind your children that this isn’t their fault, but they definitely aren’t making it easier.

Don’t forget to take care of yourself emotionally and physically during the process so you can really stick it in your ex’s fat fucking face.

Don’t forget to take care of yourself emotionally and physically during the process so you can really stick it in your ex’s fat fucking face.

Keep the lines of communication between you and your ex open in order to avoid your twin daughters reconnecting at sleepaway camp and hatching a plan to make you two fall in love all over again.

Keep the lines of communication between you and your ex open in order to avoid your twin daughters reconnecting at sleepaway camp and hatching a plan to make you two fall in love all over again.

Consider your divorce an opportunity to make the same catastrophic mistake with someone else.

Consider your divorce an opportunity to make the same catastrophic mistake with someone else.