MENLO PARK, CA—Noting that the Meta CEO had been acting rather strange lately and was using his Oculus far more than usual, Mark Zuckerberg’s wife Priscilla Chan admitted she was suspicious Thursday after he began referring to her as his “human wife.” “I don’t want to jump to conclusions, but yesterday he spent almost 14 hours on his VR headset and then when he took it off, he looked confused and asked me if I was his computer spouse or his flesh spouse,” said his wife of 12 years, adding that while she had a longstanding policy to not ask what her billionaire husband did in the Metaverse, she had to admit that she was starting to wonder. “I’m totally cool with him attending virtual meetings, going to VR concerts, or playing video games, but I’m your wife no matter what type of immersive 3D world you’re in. Yesterday, he accidentally called our son ‘digital spawn’ and then made him confirm he had legs and wasn’t just a floating torso. Call me crazy, but I just don’t like it.” At press time, Chan could not be reached for comment after her husband reportedly attempted to have sex with a Meta Quest 3 headset and was immediately electrocuted.