Clarence Thomas Annoyed After Getting Another Text From Wife Nagging Him To Overthrow Government Before He Gets Home From Work

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WASHINGTON—Muttering in frustration that he was already up to his neck in work, Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas reportedly grew annoyed Tuesday after getting another text from his wife nagging him to overthrow the government before he got home. “For Christ’s sake, Ginni, you know how busy I am this time of year,” the associate justice reportedly said to himself as he checked the half-dozen messages from his wife reminding him that it would be great if he had time today to subvert the rule of law and reinstall Donald J. Trump as president. “She doesn’t even have a real job. There’s nothing stopping her from just popping out at lunchtime when there’s less traffic and toppling the U.S. government herself. But now I look like the bad guy because I’m not dropping everything and attending to her need to send Joe Biden to jail. Ugh, she’s such a fucking bitch.” At press time, Thomas had reportedly sighed and called his wife to thank her for reminding him to overturn the 2020 election before it slipped his mind.