Billionaire Buying Sandwich Unfairly Targeted With 5% Sales Tax

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NEW YORK CITY—Calling the expense class warfare, local billionaire Kenneth Anderson was unfairly targeted Thursday with a 5% sales tax on a sandwich he was buying. “You’re singling me out with this indefensible charge because I’m wealthy, and I will not stand for it!” said Anderson, adding that being required to pay the extra 52 cents for his BLT was meant simply as a way to harass him because his net worth is $18.4 billion. “I’m actually creating jobs by buying this sandwich, and yet you decide to cruelly penalize me for it? I’m tired of being attacked every time I make a purchase just because I’m a man of means. I give plenty of money away to other snacks on my own accord. This is extortion.” At press time, Anderson vowed from now on to only buy sandwiches from small Caribbean nations with lax sales tax oversight.