Biggest Reasons Not To Sleep With A Coworker

No one should ever have to sleep with anyone in finance.

More than hearts can get broken out there on the gridiron.

Letting your coworker stay overnight during the week is one thing, but it could lead to a serious, uncomfortable conversation about carpooling to save money.

Don’t become one of those people who actually looks forward to going to their job each day because they get to see someone they’re sleeping with there.

If they were really smart or attractive, they’d be somewhere else by now.

You did read the employee code of conduct, right?

Yeah, you wouldn’t want to jeopardize the job that’s slowly killing you for a mind-blowing taboo fuckfest.

Oh, she knows about you and that slut, and she’s going to wring your flirtatious little necks.

One is fine, but two is just plain stupid.

Once emotions get involved, it can make unnecessary downsizing that much more challenging.

You might want to avoid having sex with coworkers who consistently come down with super-resistant gonorrhea.

It’s pretty embarrassing to be shamed with your picture in the company newsletter.

A healthy economy requires a large gene pool.

Because let’s face it, you’re really bad at sex.

It’s only season two. Be patient.

The two of you might think you’re being subtle, but it’s quite obvious that you’re sucking each other’s genitals under the table.

You both somehow managed to end up in the same dead-end dump of an office, so fornicating is at least a bit dangerous.

Fair is fair.

You barely manage the workload you have now.

It’s not worth all the work of locating their grave and digging up the body just to rekindle your office romance.

There’s a reason the Taco Bell corporate handbook expressly forbids it.

There’s still stacks and stacks of papers to read through!

Do something original for once in your life, like having sex with a family member.

Jesus died because he hooked up with a coworker on the same product development team.

Did your digital workplace-conduct course teach you nothing?

Fuck up the ladder, not sideways.

The man will spend half the ’90s​ unfairly ridiculing you like you’re some kind of slut.

Tacky.

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